Wednesday, May 19, 2004

I wanted to veer off subject and discuss my addiction...Books.
My room is overflowing with them. I have probably several hundreds in that entity that us bookworms know as a To Be Read Pile or TBR pile for short. A thousand I have read but I cannot bear to be parted with. I have no room to buy new ones, but I will. Why can't I stop? This is a double-edged sword. Because I am glad that there are always new stories to be told, but at the same time if I didn't get the urge to read more books because I like the story or plot, then I would have a lot more money and room. I suppose there are worse addictions, but I feel guilty when I take a pile of books to the counter at the bookstore. Even at the ubs where the owner own's 4000 of her own, I still feel like a person who lacks self-control, a spendthrift, a frivolous person. I pray about it, and I ask God to forgive my materialism, this terrible urge to buy and collect books, but I cannot help it. If I have a bad day at work, I get the itch to go to the bookstore. Heck, I can't hardly pass a bookstore without stopping in. My backpack that I take to work is overflowing with books. I have a rule that I must always have at least two books on my person, just in case... I often turn down invitations to eat lunch with coworkers because I want to use the time to read. I sound rather maudlin, perhaps a little tragic and it is actually quite humorous. I should look at it as a blessing that I can afford to buy books and also that I am a patron who helps word artists sell their books so they can make a living and get their ideas out on paper. There is a joy to reading books. I know that it stems from the unhappy years in my childhood where reading was the only sure escape. I crave that ability to be sucked into a great story between the pages of a book as I did as a child. I mean there was television, but it never held the same joy as a good book. I guess I like to draw the pictures myself instead of looking at the visuals that someone else had drawn based on their interpretation of a story. I must admit that I would rather give up the television then the ability to read a book. Now movies, that's another story for another blog entry....

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